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Video Of My CSA Presentation: “Commode Computing: Relevant Advances In Toiletry & I.T. – From Squat Pots to Cloud Bots – Waste Management Through Security Automation”

February 19th, 2011 Leave a comment Go to comments

This is probably my most favorite presentation I have given.  It was really fun.  I got so much positive feedback on what amounts to a load of crap. 😉

This video is from the Cloud Security Alliance Summit at the 2011 RSA Security Conference in San Francisco.  I followed Mark Benioff from Salesforce and Vivek Kundra, CIO of the United States.

Here is a PDF of the slides if you are interested.

Part 1:

Part 2:

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  1. February 20th, 2011 at 06:33 | #1

    Great presentation! Risky and awesome lead-in!!!

    What is the software used to build the whole 3-D journey through time?..


  2. Rob
    February 25th, 2011 at 13:45 | #2

    Ugh. I thought this presentation was horrible. It might have been a bit funny, but went on way too long (more than half the entire time Hoff was on stage). And at the end of the day it was totally irrelevant (except for the weak analogy at the end that basically said "toilets have undergone a rapid phase of innovation and security needs that too"). If we wanted simple entertainment, we could have watched TV, or the CSA could have provided some circus acts (seems like there were plenty of those around at the RSA parties). But for hundreds of people coming to learn and apply what they learn to their job, this presentation was a load of…well…crap.

  3. February 25th, 2011 at 16:03 | #3


    [from an email that I sent to Rob]

    I appreciate your honesty!

    Thanks for the feedback. It's the only negative one I've received out of a few hundred, so I'm certainly interested in your perspective.

    So you got nothing out of the need for security automation?

    If I may ask, what do you do so I can understand why this was useless to you.

    Thanks again.


  4. SomeOne
    February 25th, 2011 at 17:35 | #4

    Perspective is the medium & message(?).

    There was a fair amount of this in the graphics.

    Thankfully you spared us the nitty-gritty.

    Vote+1 What is the preso-graphics SW?

    Possibly a significant part of the effort was to show this (H)off.

    So many bad puns…

    (So the bottom line is to automate…).

    Skynet will be pleased.

    One of the best titles to grace a technical presentation.


  5. nate aka @potatohead
    February 25th, 2011 at 17:54 | #5

    I, as one of many, found it refreshing and innovative to add a little levity and comic relief to what often amount to otherwise stuffy, predictable talks. And it *was* relevant and apropos…Bravo!

  6. March 12th, 2011 at 10:17 | #6

    Let's be honest. Your presentation was very poorly researched and uninformed.

    A history of advances is very different from the random list of events you found on a search engine. First this, than this, than this…is not the same as this was an advancement because x,y,z values were met. Even worse, you have a completely ethnocentric view — you gave the classic dumb American perspective and did not mention once that the US has one of the worst sanitation designs in the world. You probably do not even know this..

    Bottom-line (pun intended) your work lacked historical accuracy and lacked any useful analysis. Synthesis of information is not the same thing as analysis, btw.

    The only redeeming value, as pointed out by others above, was a 7-year old level of humor. Ha ha, you said the word toilet.

    But it appears you think a saccharin crutch is an excuse to avoid real research. Of course, you are in good company with other entertainers. Glenn Beck and Limbaugh also have this talent of sensational and poorly-thought out spew.

    Your recent tweets that try to parody the Chinese speaking English also are like Limbaugh. Do you get all your ideas from him?

    Perhaps most disappointing is your response to Rob. He raises some good points and your response is:

    – all my friends say i'm cool, what's wrong with you?

    – tell me who you are, because i'm sure something must be wrong with you

    In case you can't tell, he and I and many others did not get anything out of your presentation. Believe it or not, it might not be something wrong with us. It's probably you.

  7. March 12th, 2011 at 10:34 | #7

    @Cloud Exec

    I'd respond, but I can't find one thing you've said that isn't an ad hominem attack or inaccurate.

    I would thank you for your comment, but you decided to anonymously comment, unlike Rob, to whom I responded and was genuinely interested in his perspective.

  8. March 13th, 2011 at 09:01 | #8

    OK, two more things (@Cloud Exec) because I think it's hysterically relevant:

    1) I didn't grow up in this country, so that fact combined with claiming a "classic dumb American perspective," especially when the timeline featured 99% of NON-AMERICAN cultural references (Indo, roman, european, asian,) means you didn't even watch the presentation.

    2) You honestly think this presentation wasn't infotainment and was intended as science? I even refer to it as "crap."

    3) Limbaugh? Beck? LOL

    4) My response to Rob wherein I thanked him for his comment and asked if the parts of the presentation that didn't feature the toiletry was valuable is "disappointing?"

    You're clearly grumpy. Perhaps you'll step up and tell us who you are and then announce when and where you're speaking next?

    Trolls. Can't live with him, can't…ah, nevermind.

  9. Dave
    March 15th, 2011 at 06:01 | #9

    I thought it was entertaining and I learned something. Haters be hatin'. I, like others, would like to know what software you used for the time line creation/animation.

  10. Dave
    March 15th, 2011 at 06:10 | #10


    Disregard the question about the timeline, looks like Timeline 3D from Beedocs. Too bad it's Mac only, another reason to buy one.

  11. A Fan
    March 20th, 2011 at 16:12 | #11

    Awsome job!

    Are your slides available? Can't read the ones in the video.


    A Fan

  12. March 29th, 2011 at 16:46 | #12

    @Dave – Yes, it's Timeline 3D.

    I also posted the slides – see the added link above.


    • Dmitri Kalintsev
      February 1st, 2012 at 15:27 | #13

      Preso pdf link leads to a nicified 404.

  1. February 20th, 2011 at 00:45 | #1
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