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Introducing the Next Generation of Cloud Computing…

It is my pleasure to introduce the fruits of the labor of months minutes of diligent research and engineering prowess — my opus magnum — the next generation of Cloud Computing.  Pending standards-body approval shortly:

Commode Computing.001 

Commode Computing.002

Commode Computing.003

Commode Computing.004

Commode Computing.005

Commode Computing.006

Commode Computing.007

I'm looking for extensive peer review prior to standards body submission.  Open source also considered.  Please ensure you comment below in order to ensure transparency.  There are no ivory towers here, flame away (although you might want to open the window first.)


  1. January 11th, 2009 at 18:04 | #1

    Don't forget: everyone else's stinks except your own.

  2. January 11th, 2009 at 18:13 | #2

    Does this mean RotoRooter is now qualified to perform Penetration Testing?

  3. January 11th, 2009 at 18:20 | #3

    If I could, this would get a standing ovation.

  4. Kaospunk
    January 11th, 2009 at 18:22 | #4

    Wait. I thought commode computing was already defined as those people who use their smart phone while on the crapper. You're forcing me to shift my paradigm! I fear change….and crap.

  5. Nate Po
    January 11th, 2009 at 18:33 | #5

    Awesomely hilarious. But don't hold back Hoff, tell us how you really feel!

  6. Brett Eldridge
    January 11th, 2009 at 20:11 | #6

    Seriously, what if cloud computing resources were as reliable (and private and secure) as my home commode? Cloud computing needs to be the same (because I don't want what I flush to come back). 🙂

  7. January 12th, 2009 at 01:29 | #7

    You missed the part about stepping in someone else's hole. And also accidently digging a hole where someone else has dug and getting leakage.
    But I am not sure how those fit with the metaphor, maybe I have spent to much time shitting in the woods.

  8. January 12th, 2009 at 06:32 | #8

    Don't forget that when the system backs up and the commode overflows, you might get more in our WC than you put in.

  9. January 12th, 2009 at 08:00 | #9

    Does this mean that Thomas Crapper now has as much computing clout as Alan Turing?

  10. January 12th, 2009 at 08:35 | #10

    I'm glad you got this out of your system!
    In the septic tank of life, please continue to lead us, but be wary of becoming too flushed with pride, the downfall of many on the throne.

  11. January 12th, 2009 at 17:46 | #11

    Like I asked on Twitter: does it come with roll-based access control?

  12. January 12th, 2009 at 22:08 | #12

    I can see the VC (or is it the WC) community getting all excited about SAAS (sanitation as a service). I do think, however, you need to extend the model to address mobility with the inclusion of port-a-potties. Either way, make sure your design is robust enough that a core dump won't bring it down (or clog it up).

  13. January 13th, 2009 at 11:40 | #13

    Umm… Prior art??? I'm sure my daughter showed me something she uploaded to the cloud last night.

  1. February 15th, 2010 at 21:10 | #1
  2. June 11th, 2010 at 13:08 | #2